I’m blown away how much Haley was able to take the parts that felt right for her into considerations. As a result she could make the necessary changes to finally feel and perform better…but seriously, I had no idea.
In my world it is important that the people who are working with me are feeling good about themselves and their work.People who suffer from intense migraines often struggle to set better boundaries for their own well being.
Here is one scenario:
A boundary is nothing more then a preference…simply preferring the color blue while a close friend or partner loves the color red are simply boundaries and both can express them without problems. Most people agree that we don’t have to hate red if we prefer blue… but here is where the challenge begins in relationships.
If one person’s wants or priority is set to stay connected to the other person and the other person is in need to like red all the time (has small range of preferences), the lover of blue will sacrifice and ignore their own love to blue adapting red as their color they love for the connection with that person. They even forgot what is true for them. Always giving in makes people feel resentful towards the other person, circumstances, and especially towards themselves.
The lover of blue who values the relationship and connection the most may feel that they will lose the relationship and often force themselves to let go of their personal truth, which is the love for blue, and let go of their preference.
If the person has to compromise all the time in order to stay in relationship soon or later serious consequences will surface for the person who has masked, pushed away, and denied their dreams and wishes for the sake of staying in relationship and having some close connection.
Here is the thing…the love for blue has been repressed to avoid losing the relationship and put under the carpet (into the subconscious) – BUT it is still there and the person is still connected to this dream through their emotions and feelings. They will begin to feel unwell experiencing the results of pretending to love someone else’s ideas.
First step to begin to heal from those pattern of personal repression.
Open up, open yourself up…get curious
Best way: Ask better questions: e.g.
- Why does the person who loves blue puts him or herself under such tremendous stress and pressure?
- Why does the person who loves blue can’t say: I love blue, and it’s okay that you are loving red?
- Why can’t you stand up for the truth of you and state: “I love blue” Why don’t you speak up?
- What can’t you stand up for?
- Is it possible that you are asking your body to pull you out of a stressful situation knowing that you would give in again?
- What are you afraid to possibly lose?
- What are you trying to get out or push out of your life?
- How to get what you want?
Sit with the answers that arise from a quiet mind. Observe what is there…sit and wait with an attitude that you don’t know the answer and be curious what shows up next.
Make notes. Try to write with the hand that you usually don’t use for writing and allow to answers to flow like a stream of conscious awareness. There are no right nor wrong answers. Its a state of alert listening.
Allow deep feelings and emotions and thoughts to present themselves to you in a non-judgmental way.
Haley did find her own answers…for that I’m so so so happy and grateful.
Physical and Emotional Changes You May Experience Once You Begin to Listen to Your Body
by Haley Guidry
Last time, I talked about the importance of listening to what your body is trying to tell you. I discussed how Simone has helped me understand what our bodies are asking us for. That migraine may not just be a coincidence. There is a good chance that you are overworked or dealing with another mental or physical stress. The migraine in this example can be your body telling you that you need to slow down and take a break.
During these past few weeks and months, I have begun to listen to my body and to respects its needs. I’ve moved myself out of unnecessarily stressful job situations, distanced myself from people who have negative energy, and I have started being more mindful of my physical needs (such as healthy food and exercise).
Although I still have a long way to go, I wanted to share with you the positive physical and emotional changes that I have been experiences simply by making a few changes in my life.
One of the very first things that I noticed after I removed myself from a very stressful job situation was the fact that I am now full of energy. Before I made this change, I was almost constantly in a state of stress and worry. Feeling these ways made my energy levels plummet. It seemed that I could never get enough sleep, and this is partially due to the fact that I was constantly thinking (and even dreaming) about work.
As soon as I made the change of dropping a client who had been making me feel bad, the change in my energy levels was almost instant. I found myself suddenly in the mood to rearrange furniture, go on a walk, or to simply spend some quality time with my husband. As time has gone by, my energy levels have continued to increase with no signs of slowing down. It is truly amazing how much more energized you can feel once you rid yourself of negativity.
After I began to evaluate my life and the things that were bringing me down, I started to want to improve my health. It’s funny how one small thing can lead to a chain of events in that way. As soon as I had more energy, I also recognized that certain foods didn’t make me feel my best. I was already so happy from the small improvements that I had made so far, that I simply didn’t want it to end!
I have begun to cut small things out of my diet that I know aren’t great for me. Cutting out simple things such as added sugar has helped me tremendously. Always remember, even baby steps can make a HUGE change for you. I am proud that my diet has been improving, but I am excited to improve it even more. My plan is to work with Simone on an Iris Analysis. This is a great and amazing tool that can help Simone customize a diet plan, just for you. I am very excited to take this next step and to see how much better my mind and body will feel.
My health has also improved because I now have the energy to exercise again. I have always enjoyed exercise, but I had been so stressed that I would not give myself the time or pleasure to do so. After my energy levels increased, I could not wait to get back into the gym.
More Sound Sleep
Another thing that I have noticed lately is my improved quality of sleep. I used to wake up literally every hour or two. I am embarrassed to admit that each and every time, I would go to check my work email. Doing my job well is something that I take pride in, and knowing that I could have a disappointed client kept me up at night (even though I had no reason to think that).
I used to almost dread going to bed, because I knew that for one – I wasn’t going to sleep well, and secondly – I was afraid that I was going to miss something during that time that may lead to a client being dissatisfied. When I learned how to let these negative emotions and negative feelings go, my sleep has been better that I can ever remember. Not only do I feel rested, but I am able to look forward to lying in bed at night instead of dreading it.
Before I started doing my best to listen to my body, my mood was frequently bad. I was always so worried about work and other things that I wouldn’t care about the world around me. I would never give myself any down time, so when someone would try to get me to relax it would only annoy me. I always felt that I had to be getting things done, and everything else was just a distraction that was going to keep me from reaching my goal. I was so consumed by these things that I no longer enjoyed the things I loved in the same way as before.
Now that I have been able to prioritize the important things in my life, I can see how wrong I was before. None of those positive things or people were distractions – I was letting myself go down a hole and I couldn’t seem to pull myself out of it. Sometimes it can be hard to take that first step towards helping yourself. I truly think that having contact with a positive and mindful person like Simone was one of the things that put me in the right mindset to help myself. I am now feeling more like myself, and I am not afraid to take the time to be in a good mood and to enjoy life.
It can be rather difficult to fully describe the ways in which I feel better since I decided to listen to my body. Sometimes it seems that intense feelings can be indescribable. I hope that these few examples can help you begin to understand the importance of helping yourself, and letting others like Simone put you on the right path. I promise you, you won’t regret it!